Go ahead...peruse the news for the day. Think things aren't getting stupid? Let's take a look together, shall we? I just want to make sure no one misses some of today's 'This Day In History' moments. I can't think of a better place to start than with John Edwards. Remember John? He was the one that was devout in his beliefs and was going to lead us to the Promised Land of Politics. Sadly, John's indictment came in today. Yes, ol' Johnny got busted and, as expected, used the tried and true, "I didn't break the law...and didn't even know that would be considered against the law," defense. Let's see....running for President, sympathy for wife's cancer, devout christian and....OOPS! Johnny had a girlfriend! Wait, it gets better because.....he got her pregnant! Brilliant man that he is, he tries to get someone else to claim THEY fathered the child. Hey, John - how's life in that House of Cards? He spent $925,000.00 to hide this woman with money received from donors....then said he didn't know it was against the law. Want to be a devout christian and someone I want as a leader, John? Give that $925K to a few homeless shelters and take care of the kids that we cannot feed or house in this country. As for the 'devout' part (and this will get me going on another tirade), it makes me think of a saying I've grown quite fond of - "Religious people scare me, spiritual people inspire me." This might be the divisive part of the blog, but here goes anyway. I am tired of people that try to define what a "good christian" is by showing me the rolls at church. Quite frankly, I do not care who goes to church, I care what they do with it afterward when they walk out those doors. And don't tell me that, just because people don't park it in a pew every Sunday that they are not the Christians of which you speak. The world is filled with people that do good things for their fellow man every day, yet haven't been in a church for years. Okay, I'm done. More news.....and these are really good, too.
Sarah Palin - yes, she made the news today, too. This is so good, I have to quote it exactly. While visiting the Old North Church (of Paul Revere fame) in Boston today, she had this little bit of history for us...and I quote,
"He who warned the British that they weren't going to be taking away our arms by ringing those bells and, um, making sure as he's riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that, uh, we were going to be secure and we were going to be free."
Wait, what? Seriously? Okay, I realize there's not going to be a test on American History when you decide to run for President. I truly understand that, like asking my sophomore Geometry teacher when I'd need it in the future, she won't get questioned about it while reducing the deficit. We all know this was just a simple question and she chose to visit the church, but...are you serious? He warned the British? They weren't going to be taking away our arms? Sent those warning shots? Will someone please hand her a small plastic container and send her to the ladies room? I want to know, exactly, what she's been smoking or ingesting? THIS is what we're sending to the plate? We don't have a pinch-hitter? I've said it before and I'll say it again - it ain't about who's best for the job, it's about who has the fewest skeletons in the closet. Apparently, it's about who's not afraid to look really stupid on national TV, too. I now have a headache from literally shaking my head over this one.
Okay, two more 'quickies'. The first involves an 11-year old boy in California that broke his teacher's nose. He actually started screaming at her, then got up and punched her in the nose, breaking it. What, you ask, did the teacher do to cause this behavior? (go ahead, ask) Thanks - I'll tell you. She asked him to move to another seat in the classroom. I know what you're thinking...and I felt the same way - how DARE she? What was she thinking? How rude! Yes, I am being very sarcastic. Remember what I said a few weeks ago - we cannot punish them and they know it. I can show you teachers that have stopped teaching because of these very issues. Parents, it's time to step up. This kid needs his ass beat and NOW! This is unacceptable and he needs to be disciplined...and before all the child advocates start their ranting, how do you propose to stop this? Wait....time-out, perhaps? NEWS FLASH - Time-outs are what started this debacle. Time to revert back to the methods that actually worked. Freaks.
Lastly, there's the lady that is suing Dunkin' Donuts in Philadelphia. No, no....that one's been tried before. She didn't spill the coffee so they had to invent a new 'coffee scam'. They are asking for unspecified damages because (so she claims), a worker put sugar in her coffee rather than artificial sweetener. (Audible Gasp) Oh. My. God. Can you believe it? I know, right? How stupid are we that we never tried THAT before? You mean....rather than hard work and toiling away all day at my job, all I had to do was get a screwed up coffee order to make it to Easy St? Really? I am so disappointed in myself. Yes, that was more sarcasm...and a lot of it. You know who I am really disappointed with? The lawyers. I know that's not a big shock, either, but what do you call a hundred lawyers going off a cliff in a bus? A great start! Oh, man....I slay me. Thank you very much, folks...don't forget to tip your waitresses...I'm here all week! Sugar instead of sweetener, huh? We are seriously damaged and, quite honestly, I'm not sure we can make it back from the brink we're teetering on....
Until next time..............