Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Tour Continues....

Tuesday, huh?  April 19th.  Stardate......well, it's.....I mean.....oh, hell, what's a 'Stardate'?  Now, now....before you Star Trekkies hit me with a long explanation, I'd like to point out that I know the date!  That's right, the actual True Trek Stardate is 64764.2 and the True Trek Year is 2387.  Ha!  Didn't think I knew it, did you?  Well, now you know I am well aware, though I have never been a 'trekkie'.  How did I know, you ask? (go ahead, ask)  I'll tell you - Google.  That's right, we can actually Google the true stardate...which leads to my next question.  This is what you people do?  Dress up like Spock or Kirk with your tazers or whatever they were....and checked the stardate?  Impressive.  Bet you're the gang that wears the pocket protectors by day, too, huh?  Seriously, I won't make fun when you come to fix my computer, Mr IT Guy.  For those of you wondering, yes, it has been a slow day.....

So the 'Tour' is continuing.  Departure from Destin, FL this morning after an appointment.  Captain in bad mood as appointment went south...as in 'it sucked.  Crew remained in sunny Florida as Captain commandeered ship northward.  Stopped for quick 'port-of-call' visit in Birmingham, only to be undocked and heading northwest shortly thereafter.  Finally reached destination in state of panic...er, I mean State of Arkansas.  Beautiful view across horizon as ship approached Little Rock.  Well lit as the lightning strikes blistered the darkened sky....and the blistering continues.  40,052 people currently without power as the storms roll in and the sirens blare.  Captain taking it in stride as he has heard the tornado sirens previously, along with the hail that is.....wait, what?  Hail?  From the sky?  That would make it....Holy Hail?  Yeah, I still slay me. 

The good news is I haven't seen Jim Cantore yet.  You all know him - The Weather Channel meteorologist that must go to the gym about 9 days a week with the clean-shaven head.  Okay, bald.  You tell him...'cause there is NO WAY I'm saying it.  Anyway, if you don't know the drill, here's my advice - when Cantore shows up in your town...LEAVE!  Immediately.  Like, NOW!  This is the guy that they drop in the middle of a hurricane...and he stands there in 80 mph winds broadcasting.  He's a beast.  Bordering on insane...in a good way, though (especially if he's reading this).  I don't know if he drew the short straw or just likes being there, but he's always in the middle of the action.  I suppose it is one way of ensuring camera time.  I think I'd be good at that, too...as long as they could pry me from under the table, get me out of the fetal position, wrench my thumb from my mouth, and stop me from calling for Mommy.  Okay, I made that up....but there is no way I am heading INTO the storm.  Good ol' Jim, the Rockstar Weatherman.

So here's to hoping everyone's had a great day.  Here's to hoping Sharon, Brittany, and Erika are having fun at the beach without me.  Operative words?  Without me.  We had fun last night, though.  Britt was determined to have Dad get more ink.  On skin.  Yes, another tattoo.  I few more and I can join the circus with the bearded lady and the knife-swallowing cowboy.  Alright, there aren't that many and you can't see them.....we'', you can, but you have to ask really nicely.  Or not.  I have been known to show them on a long Corona, scotch, tequila night.  You might not even have to ask.....I usually offer.  So go to bed, it's late.  Stop reading, and close the lid of the lapto.....damn it, more sirens.  I really have to go.  Y'all can stay if you'd like but I'm heading offline.  We'll talk.  Soon.  I promise.....

Until next time.......

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