Thursday, June 30, 2011

Pretty Sure I'll Take Heat For This.....

Today was to have been the first day of a very long weekend.  'Was' being the operative word.  Like many, I cannot bring myself to walk past the Blackberry, sitting on the counter charging, without at least looking at it.  It's a bad habit and one I've tried to break for years.  Unfortunately, I've been unable to cut the electronic leash.  I simply looked at it early this morning and, realizing there was an unfinished project that required attention, started typing.  Even as I began, I knew it was wrong.  Fortunately, too, I work with a great team who, after seeing my responses, politely told me I was on vacation and to put it down.  Finally, I heeded their advice.  If only they knew I was going to have to do yard work......

As with any other early morning in my office, I turn on the television to catch the Today Show.  Still a bit undecided about Ann Curry and I miss Meredith.  Actually, I wish they'd given the job to Natalie Morales.  I like her interviewing style better as she, unlike Ann, doesn't tend to 'lean in' and interrupt guests.  Watch her sometime - the hands are moving as she leans toward the person she's interviewing, then interrupts or stammers a bit while asking her next question.  I know it's just me and a personal taste, but, it throws me off and annoys me.  Yeah, how's that for a little glimpse inside me, huh?  I get annoyed because Ann Curry leans in, talks with her hands, and interrupts.  You'd think I would have bigger things annoying me which, truth be told, I do...but that's another story. 

The story I was referring to that I expect to 'catch heat' for, however, involved one of their 'Survey Studies' involving infidelity.  Uh-huh.  Yes, please fasten your seat belts and keep hands and feet in the car for the duration of the ride - I'm sure it's going to get bumpy.  The segment I am referring to was titled, "How Women Really Feel About Infidelity."  Now, I'm sure this is compelling to many and, quite honestly, I sat there and listened to the entire segment.  They were showing survey questions like, "Does social media make it easier to cheat?" (Yes - 81%) and, "Does social media make it easier to get caught?" (Yes - 80%).  Apparently, 80 guys have been busted and one is still delusional. thinking he won't get caught.  The other questions involved how forgiving a woman would be about her man sexting another woman.  In case you wonder, single women would be less forgiving of their boyfriends doing this than married women would be of their husbands doing this.  Then, after the third or fourth question of this nature, I had to ask (as I always do when this subject comes up), "Why  is it we are only asking women how they feel about a man cheating?"  I'm pretty sure these things are taking place and involve both men AND women.  I mean, I don't think Ralph gets up one morning, dissatisfied with his marriage, and sends Frank a text that says, "Hey, baby, I'm hot for you.  Let's meet for drinks after work in a secluded spot."  Okay, that might be happening in San Francisco...and now, New York, but still.  You get my point, right?  I'm just saying that the days of men going to work and leaving their wife at home to cook and clean are, for the most part, over.  In many, if not most, marriages both spouses are working and have more than ample opportunity to have an affair if they choose. 

These stories and segments on morning TV, while interesting and compelling, always seem to cast men in the negative spotlight.  I hear you, ladies.  You are hurt if something happens that undermines your relationship.  It can be devastating.  What, though, makes you think that it's a one-way street?  Why are women the only gender that are prone to this type of devastation and hurt?  I understand that part, too - women will talk about it, men simply want to pummel the other guy or blow something up.  Run a car into a wall, even.  My point is, simply, that women are equally prone to having an affair as a man and men  are just as rocked by this happening.  It's the same thing with spousal abuse or child custody.  You can argue the point if you wish, but I can tell you that, if you do any research, more men than women get arrested for spousal abuse and custody of a child is awarded to the mother more than the father.  In these days of equality, maybe, just maybe, we ought to reconsider our stance on many of these issues...because now, more than ever, it's tough being a white man.  Say what you want about us getting "all the breaks" and having advantages in our jobs, etc - no one ever passed legislation telling employers they had to fill quotas with white men.  Sorry...the infidelity segment got me ranting.

Until next time.......

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