Dear American Idol: You've had a great run, but I think someone has finally figured out a way to put a better show on the tube. Don't get me wrong, you've found some amazing talent and great artists. We all enjoyed Simon calling it as he saw it. Randy's "Yo' Dog," was something we will all remember, too. We'd still appreciate it if you'd share what Paula was on. By 'share', I mean share. Don't tell us....literally, share. Now THAT was some good stuff. Then you added Ellen...and though I have nothing against her, I have to ask. Ellen? THAT Ellen? On American Idol? Sometimes, it's a little easier to spot the 'beginning of the end' than others. In case you're wondering.....again, Ellen. Don't make me draw a diagram. Anyway, you've given us some greats....and some not-so-greats. Anyone seen Taylor Hicks lately? Reuben Studdard? Right, my point exactly. On the other hand, Daughtry was a rockin' non-winner....who ended up winning anyway, right? Face it, it's been a great show. What I had a problem with, though, is that we always had to sit through the 'singers' that thought they were really good. The same ones that bitch-slapped the cameraman on the way outside, then dropped a few expletives. Typically, the ones beginning with 'F'. Yeah, I could say it....but I have more class than that. (BIG pause) Oh, alright, I really don't. This is a PG-rated page, though. Seriously, don't we remember the contestants that walked out screaming that neither Randy, Paula, or Simon had a clue? I think the conversations were generally, "Days sum dumbasses. Day doe no wassa good singa. And 'dat Pawwa? She'd a snide beyotch." Sound familiar? Well spoken, too, huh? The other issue I had was...did no one tell these people this was a SINGING competition? What's with the 'floor shows' we got to witness? Again, compelling television, but really? Which brings me to....The VOICE.
"The Voice" premiered on NBC last night and I dare say they rocked it. Yeah, it might have been a bit much with Cee Lo Green, Christina Aguilera, Blake Shelton, and Adam Levine performing at the start of the show, but waiting to see how this worked was worth it. Each of the 4 judges, with their back to the singer, gets to pick up to 8 people to coach and mentor in this competition. If they like what they hear, they push their button, their chair turns 180 degrees toward the singer, and they get to see whom they chose. Here's the catch: if more than one judge picks a performer, that performer gets to choose the team they wish to join. The beauty of this show, in my opinion, is that all we heard were good performers. They had already auditioned and this was their final callback. We didn't have to endure someone dressed in an 'Uncle Sam' tophat, waving a flag, singing Yankee Doodle Dandy. These singers rocked it. All good music, interesting concept, and we got to watch Christina all but fall out of her dress every time she went for the button. Didn't matter who, toward the end, was singing. I was screaming, "Push it, Christina....plleeeaasssseee....." Not met with rave reviews here at home, but hey....she was leaning! The rest of the show might not be great, but this was a good start. I'm a little Idol-weary. Oh, and Carson Daly wasn't the show a la Ryan Seacrest. Not really a host as much as a 'hang with the family and watch the reactions' kind of guy. Again, it worked.
Final Tally ------The Voice - 1 American Idol - 0
The other pressing issue I needed to (or felt compelled to, anyway) share was a commercial. Yes, really...for none other than Ancestry.com. I know, right? So there we sat, watching the show, when a commercial begins with an elderly....okay 60-ish...black man dressed in khakis and a sweater. I think. Something close.....look, that's not important. Dressed nicely....okay? I'm watching, as I do with most commercials, with one ear. Hey, I can pull it off...relax. Seriously, though, the commercial starts and I get up to refill my coffee. As I stand, I hear, "I was a little afraid...I mean, as an African-American, I knew where my family tree might end up..." Wait. Say what? Did I just hear what I thought I heard? I pushed the 'pause' button ( to stop live-TV....cool gadget....you need one) and stared at the TV. I couldn't WAIT to hear where this was going...and didn't want to miss a word. I put my cup down and used BOTH ears this time, pushed the 'rewind' button and went back to the beginning. I let it play all the way through this time. The entire monologue was this: "I was a little afraid...I mean, as an African-American, I knew where my family tree might end up. But I went on ancestry.com anyway and I found out my great-great-grandfather was born a slave...(artistic pause for effect) but died as a businessman...and that was worth finding." Nice commercial, I get it. Find out cool things about your ancestors. Can we back up for a moment? Please? What EXACTLY was meant by saying "as an African-American, I knew where my family tree might end up?" I'm guessing, in hindsight, he meant as a slave? You think? My immediate thought was that he was worried it might end up back in Virginia with Sally Hemmings and Tom Jefferson. Yeah, as an African-American I guess that would scare you a bit.....and though we know this page is for fun, I'm not going to start citing stereotypes. I'm not going to say he was afraid he might finally like baked chicken....or cantaloupe. I will NOT go there. But I could. I just won't. Go ahead....you're already doing it in your mind. It's all good.
So, there is today's take on events. Oh, yeah, and the tornaodes. I'll post a few pics online. We found a piece of siding from a double-wide. It's about 6' long and mangled. You know it was from a double-wide, too. Pretty amazing watching this stuff fall from the skies...and I'm not sure I want to do it all that often, either.
Until next time.......